Madness and Euphoria

NOTE. This a fore warning, there is some major PG13 language up in here. You may have guessed this by the blog image. HAAHAA. Don't be shocked, this is real, and me, and how I speak. Also, you may want to ensure you put any warm beverages aside if you're a saddist, and enjoy my humour, there is bound to be spillage.

I have just spent 30minutes, screaming with laughter in my car on my drive home. Not because I am bat shit crazy, but because I have come to the conclusion that I am incredibly quick to say that was crazy, or INSANE, or hardcore. 

Let me tell you, what I have just done, was the hardest thing I have done in my entire fucking life. Honest to god. Everything before that 6km Trail Run suddenly feels pretty average. 

I started off with a little trot, thinking this ain't so bad. I'm strong, I can do this. This was quickly replace by a "Woah, there sailor, you have clearly forgotten, you don't even run in your dreams". So I did my usual power walk. There was a little uphill. Again, this isn't so bad. I'm strong. I can do this. Much huffing and puffing already. I had long since broken a sweat. I had yet another moment of realization  that I am "gym fit" I can thrash the shit out of a workout, but running and endurance and I do not get along. Little 5km Park Runs and I get along sweetly, but as soon as I step up the pace, I am put in my place.

I thought I was put in my place. I joked about last weekends hike, with the hills, and the bugs and the potential threat of hill billy's. I joked about hills making me their bitch. Shit just got real today! Fucken fast.

In all my history of training and pushing and workouts I can only remember one lonely occasion where I nearly puked during a workout, that was my very first session with my personal trainer. Yes I'm strong like Mother Russia, because believe me I push myself. Today, I nearly "Power Spat" about 10 times going up the hill. Came so close at a few points I was looking for a bush, and wondering if the martials overhead would see me in my fast approaching very un-lady like predicament. How I didn't, I actually can not tell you. Said hill from today was every insane workout I have ever done, crunched together and amplified by around 100. That shit will kill people. As I was going up, I thought "Its no wonder they ask for your medical aid details when you enter".  I even deployed Mr Carl Cox and a Techno onslaught to fuel me, it failed dismally. I have never, ever, in my entire life, done anything like that. Not even close.

"Started from the bottom now we're here." This is about midway up.

I tackled that hill after my legs were ready to quit. After my head was seriously wondering what the fuck I had gotten myself into. After I for a split second wondered how far it would be to get my ass back. Again, strong like mother Russia. The mind is indeed a powerful thing.

Walter Sisulu has made me his bitch. Again, I have jokes, and I have said this often, today it really happened. I even did a little bum surfing on some loose rocks during the decent to consummate this union.
Speaking of bums, if i keep that up, I will have an ass like the Rock of Gibraltar. Motivation much? I think so!

There was however a light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, when I got to that water station, I felt like the first Arab that struck oil. Elated is putting it mildly. But the real light, was seeing my girls waiting for me after they had long since finished up. This also has something to do with me having their phones and car keys, haaaaaahahahahahaha, well played there Mich. Kidding. ;)

"The Dream Team" - Louisa, Miss Faboosh, Tanya & Farrah

Friends don't do that to friends. No. Real friends encourage one another to push themselves, which is exactly what Farrah did when she pushed me to enter. Thank you to Farrah, Louisa and Tanya for sharing this with me, and pushing me. That finish line was a shining moment in my life and journey. Next time I'll sprint to finish for you, when I'm not so broken.

I am so forever fucken proud of myself for that spat of sweat, near tears, and sheer relentless drive.
I have set the bar pretty damn high for myself now. I can now say "On a scale from 1 to Merrell Autumn Trail Run, stop kidding yourself, its about a 2. Harden the F up and push harder". I didn't come in stone last, but I did bring up the rear, with my almost 2 hours long near death experience. But I did it, and I proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is a machine in me who is boss. That my heart is much stronger than my head, and that I can conquer much more than mountains.

Event Details - Merrell Autumn 6km Trail Run, organised by Mountain Runner
http://mountainrunner.co.za/