A year in the making.

Washed by a flood of emotions, and immersed by a sense of reflection I sit here thankful for taking a decision to make the changes I have. A year ago I started to right the wrongs of the past. I started living a better, healthier life. I took a decision to treat my body in a way I had never felt was necessary, with kindness, energy and passion for living. What I essentially did was start setting myself free. In a lot of senses and in retrospect, I gave up who I was.

The vodka loving party girl, and her false sense of happiness are no more. Shame. She was replaced by a Kombucha fuelled trail blazer. Someone who I much prefer. Yes I do still get down to filthy beats, and yes I do still venture passed the feather boa curtain of gay clubs, and yes, there is still the more than occasional glass of wine involved. But all in all I’m the furthest thing imaginable from the person I was.

Happier, freer, more passionate, more real, more vibrant. I have transformed, am transforming, I am becoming a product of my true destiny.

Today, almost a year to the day of starting me new life, I received pictures of me in all my large and in charge glory. I was a maid-of-honour-type-something at an ethnic wedding right before I got my game plan together. Although being happy for my friend, and despite being as loud and ridiculous as I was, I was dreading having so much attention on me. Being one of two “white chicks” in the entire joint meant all eyes were on me, and not the bride – no jokes. In part I realised I would have been happier being the smoking hot centre of attention at least, you know. *wink*

 

SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!!!

The difference a year, a mindset shift and 25+ kg's makes...

Needless to say, that picture almost sent me crashing off my chair. I’m not going to get into the nitty-gritty or self-loathing aspect. I will rather touch on the relief. Relief that I woke the fuck up, made a move and stuck with it. I am hopelessly thankful that I overcame myself, and got out of my own way. Thankful that I embraced my new lifestyle head on. Every other “diet” has lasted not much longer than 5minutes, and there have been a not so fabulous repertoire of them. I need to sit back and wonder what would have happened to my life if I continued the way I was going. Where would I have ended up, and much more trapped would I be? That said, an entire year later I am still going strong, and am a sheizze load closer to my short skirts and Zara dresses.

A year later I have a handle on my life. I am loving my fresh new vibe. Am so incredibly thankful for my friends in fitness. These are people who have come into my life, cheered me on, backed me up and seen me through some outrageous spats of language that would shame a sailor. I am klapping my workouts. If you have been following my blog since the tender beginning you will know I wanted to be a workout thrasher from early on. I am honestly quite impressed by the way I took that on and owned it. My ass is looking great, by the way. My efforts have seen me lose 25kg’s and win 360XBT Season 3. Both unreal achievements for me. I have wrestled my emotional emotions, and won. I get excited about mud races, and early morning adventures. I am ploughing through my “one day” wardrobe. You know the things you buy impulsively because if you lose 5kg’s you’ll fit into it. Right. I have a new vision for my life. I want to live a life I never realised I wanted for myself, and I nudge closer to that every single day.

I do need to get a tad sentimental here and thank a monumental man for my success. Carl Mason Liebenberg, I applaud you. Your vision, authenticity, fight for freedom, passion and unrelenting need to live a better fuller life has permeated through so much of me, and is the essence of who I am becoming. Your dream and vision to transform lives has been something I have been deeply thankful for everyday of the past 7 months. You have given me my life back.

Ahem. Brief moment of tenderness aside. I cannot wait for the next 12months of life changing, inspiring, courageous, outrageous transformation. I look forward to pushing my limits, living beyond my comprehension and becoming the best version of myself I could ever create. There is so much more available to you within in this life, and you are the only thing stopping you from experiencing it. Want more for yourself, believe you are worth it. Fight for that person inside you that you need to do right by. Accept challenges, accept the fears you have and transform them into triumph.

Give yourself 12months. Believe me, it goes by in an instant. See just how much closer you get to you a new you, to a you that you never for a second thought was within you.